This week on Newstopia: Anzac Day marches; Sir John Gielgud in Harare; Nutrogino Pumice from the New Liberal HQ discusses the recent activities of Peter Costello, Mark Vaile, Wilson Tuckey and Alexander Downer; Syria's nuclear activities; SE Asia correspondent Chris Walken updates us on the Olympic torch; Willie Schludecker visits Bath after previously bombing it; Kate McGyver of the ACTU avoids discussing WorkChoices; Dario Cinquetti is Newstopia's Man in Time; Inspektor Herring; Father Stavros-Pathos struggles to discuss Cyprus' reunification; Paula Conehead from the ALP on the new Alcopop tax; Jacinta Moist adds a few thoughts; The Hague considers Allo Allo atrocities; Aaron Cheviot from the Democrats ponders their demise; a very specific Guinness world record attempt; Larry Marble from CommSec talks finance; the crew farewell us over the credits; one final assassination suggestion

• Nicholas Bell
• Kat Stewart
• Shaun Micallef